Patricia Comb
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SEAGULL WARS

6/13/2021

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   Good morning dear reader and welcome to a truly scorching Sunday morning at Chez Comb. We could indeed be in the south of France with all the beautiful weather we have been enjoying this week. Evening watering of my many pots, sinks and tubs has been ongoing. Thankfully we have lots of rainwater butts and a large 1,000 litre IBC water tank. Even so, I will have to step outside and do a rain dance soon, (don't worry - I'll make sure the darkness has descended when I do it - don't want to scare the neighbours). Our free water supplies are dwindling and Mother Nature needs a nudge to redress the balance. Spouse is still clearing the site for my new mega-shed and in the process is creating a space for another IBC tank. With the effects of global warming, I think we need to harvest every drop of water that we can.

   Speaking of Spouse and let's face it when don't I? He has laboured away like Hercules again this week and has finally got the better of the old tree stump. It has been demolished and the remains now reside under an old shrubbery in our front garden for the insect life to enjoy for years to come.  Spouse has now turned his attention to dismantling the old shed and, being the thrifty soul he is, has taken it apart as carefully as he can in order to upcycle as much wood as possible and save the rest for our winter fires. Well, my dear reader, the sun shone brightly and fiercely but dear Spouse has stuck to his task throughout the week and every night trailed back up the garden, black as a rat and happy as a sandboy, being a few steps nearer to saying goodbye to the old shed.

   In and amongst all this activity our old friend, the hungry seagull returned to visit us. In the early Spring Mr Seagull and his lady love took up residence on Spouse's shed roof and made many a sortie into the garden to raid our bird feeders which led them to explore the garden some more and hence they found the pond - and the fish within. I remember the moment they found them. Casual curiosity turned instantly to intense scrutiny and concentration. I could almost hear their seagull thoughts, 'Oh my - breakfast!!!' And so began the first seagull war - the pair of them kept on trying a sneaky fishing expedition when they thought we weren't around - only we were and would rush out to see them off. Only one day we were too late and they nabbed a fish apiece and perched triumphantly on the shed roof, taunting us with their meal dangling from their beaks.

   And so, Spouse made some wooden frames and covered them with netting to place over the pond to deter any further fishing expeditions and this proved successful. The seagulls investigated the frames but could not find any access to the pond. Well and good and they pushed off - co-incidentally I think, as it was nesting time. Unfortunately for us, their nesting efforts must have been successful as now Mr Seagull has re-appeared in search of food, probably for a growing family of chicks and so the seagull wars have recommenced. For a couple of days I did my mad woman dash out to the garden to scare him off, but he was soon back and patrolling the perimeter of the pond intently watching for fish.  Spouse was working behind his shed and so couldn't keep watch for our gull friend. 

   Out came the netted frames again, only we couldn't put them across the pond as all the summer reeds and plants were growing up apace. Instead, we fixed them around the sides, like cot sides to a bed. 'That will keep him off,' says Spouse confidently and returned to his work. Oh no it didn't!!  Spouse worked patiently on dismantling the shed and Mr Seagull worked diligently at trying to find a way into the pond, without success. One day he tried a bit too hard and hopped up on to the edge of the frame. The prop supporting it gave way under his weight and collapsed with a bang. Up shoots Mr Seagull into the air, squawking wildly. He wheeled away flying low in Spouse's direction and narrowly skimmed his head. Spouse dodged to avoid him; trouble was, he was holding the whole gable end of the shed at the time and it came crashing down on his head. Oh dearie me, out with the steri strips and plasters again.

   We have re-inforced our defences and Mr Seagull still visits, but for the moment we seem to have called a truce. He gets a drink from our old water trough and trashes a few of my pot plants in his frustration, but that is all. Watch this space, dear reader. I don't think we're done yet by a long chalk.

​    I am aware of the phrase, 'be careful what you wish for,' but I do wish for some rain and I'm sure the local farmers do too. Their crops will be in great need of water by now. Rain dancing it will have to be. Have a good week, dear reader and enjoy the sunshine, (and rain if we get it). Meanwhile, I will be out with my watering can again this evening - no rest for the wicked!
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